Random Convo (II)

Continuing from part I, another random burst of laughter amongst us

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ML:"Bro, you wana get a Jack size bed?"

Sam:" Huh?"

ML:" You know, got King size, Queen size... then Jack size lah"

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ML: "You know why the govt budget deficit? Build so many ERP gantries everywhere, but haven't turn on, of course deficit!"

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And for all the geeks in us... Star wars fans or not...

www.failblog.org

Pages and pages of funny pics at www.failblog.org. Check it out, I laughed quite hard at a few of them.

A Jedi, You Will Be?

Taken from Wiki

England and Wales

In England and Wales 390,127 people (0.7 percent) stated their religion as Jedi on their 2001 Census forms, surpassing Sikhism, Judaism, and Buddhism, and making it the fourth largest reported religion in the country. The highest percentages of such responses were typically in cities with high student populations.^[10] In the 2001 Census 2.6 percent of the population of Brighton claimed to be Jedi. The percentages of religious affiliations were:

• Christian: 72.0%
• No religion: 14.8%
• Chose not to respond: 7.7%
• Muslim: 3.1%
• Hindu: 1.1%
• Jedi: 0.7%

Read in the news about how the founder of the Jedi Church was assaulted by a man with metal crutches while screaming "DARTH VADER!". The irony of the situation really got me laughing and piqued my curiosity enough to try and find out how true this 'religion' is. Seems like the Jedi faith is strong! It's the 4th largest religion in England and Wales.

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Now playing: Dave Matthews - Ants Marching
via FoxyTunes

Supercool

"If only everyone saw you the way your pet does"

Not Funny.... meh?

Somehow, nobody else finds this comics funny. Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?? :(

I find it hilarious. Don't you? Maybe I am a freak with a skewed sense of humour.



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Now playing: Dishwalla - Angels Or Devils
via FoxyTunes

Now, for the weather report.

Meteorologists in Singapore must have one of the easiest and most boring jobs around...

Miracle Beer Diet - More bloopers are a click away

The Definition of ROFLOL

We Little Shits

A very self-important college freshman attending a recent football game, took it upon himself to explain to a senior citizen sitting next to him why it was impossible for the older generation to understand his generation.

'You grew up in a different world, actually an almost primitive one,' the student said, loud enough for many of those nearby to hear. 'The young people of today grew up with television, jet planes, space travel, man walking on the moon, our spaceships have visited Mars. We have nuclear energy, electric and hydrogen cars, computers with light-speed processing and,' pausing to take another drink of beer.

The Senior took advantage of the break in the student's litany and said, 'You're right, son. We didn't have those things when we were young... so we invented them. Now, you arrogant little shit, what are you doing for the next generation?'

Keep It Short n Simple (KISS)

Found this hilarious. The actors did a good job of keeping it light-hearted and entertaining. Educational too! Haha. Yes, French Kissing wasn't invented by the French. Lastly, remember "if it feels right, you're probably doing it right".




VideoJug: How To Kiss Someone Passionately

Random Convo

song : Frank Sinatra - Cake
mood: amused
book-in-hand: Hunters of Dune by Brian Herbert (Frank Herbert's son)



Warning.... most people are not expected to comprehend what transpires in the following.....





ML:" I look like Bruce Lee meh? WTF"

SP: "yeah you do, yandao man."

ML: "maybe cos my nose round"

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ML:"You eat ba zhang? I give you a few, you dun eat much wan"

SP:"Eat zhang until zheng ah"

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SP: "my dog is fat, but my cat cannot put on weight one"

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ML: " "arh-kee-tech-ture" "

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ML: "what happens when u post yr ad on a butch and lesbian site"

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SP:"SHAME ON YOU now you watch my little pony!"

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SP: "do all spanish ppl have moles?"

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ML: "i just ate chempadak. song"

SP: "shuddup. I dun even know what is that"


ML: " hahaha its the thing, they use to fry, u know

u got goreng pisangu
u got fried champedak
the orange one"

SP:"dunno
dunno
dunno ........DUNNO

Stop describing!!!"

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ML: " eh,u gonna store yr hair
until you come back right"

You're It!

Was tagged recently to do this, but haven't got round to it due to exams and the rush of packing everything into storage. All of the sudden, a sense of emptiness pervades throughout now that everything is done. It's like the calm before the storm and the silence of the birds before dawn.

Rules: Post 6 things you think is weird about yourself and go on to tag other people.



1. I am not ticklish in the usual sense. You can name all the usual spots - i.e neck, armpits, waist, underfoot - and I am immune to the hysterical laughter expected to be forthcoming from me. However, I am ticklish in one particularly unusual spot that most people would not expect to be. NOT TELLING.

2. Right before I go to sleep, I twitch abit. No no, not like the violent kind. It's more like just one particular muscle, say the biceps, would clench and unclench involuntarily as I enter slumber. I never knew about this until a few friends pointed it out as I dozed off. I think it's just the way my body relaxes the muscles from the tensions of the day as it prepares to recharge itself.

3. A cleanliness and tidiness freak awaits the chance to burst out of me. I don't think I have OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) but it definitely borders on it. I really really really hate germs. I don't really get all that bothered about a place being dusty (but I don't enjoy it) but once there's a chance for germs (read fluids, BODILY FLUIDS) to propagate and infect. STAY AWAY. It's not that bad, but it does get noticeable especially if you live with me. So sorry for all the rules when in my room yeah, Brian and Kuan? No exceptions, you still can't get under my bed covers and still no food in my room.

4. I can't write with my right hand but can't play badminton with my left. Hahaha, yes this is a weird one. Somehow my brain seems to be a little badly wired (actually in all senses it's badly wired) and I am left-handed in most things like writing and eating and etc etc, but when it comes to sports I just tend to be right-handed. So for racket sports, basketball, even football, I use my right hand. Funny eh?

5. I hate Sundays. Yes, Sundays. Not Mondays or any other working day, but Sunday. Sundays are when I get homesick the most. When I have nothing to do and think on old times. When I remember the loneliness. When I miss doing stuff like lazing about in bed with the one you love. I hate Sundays.

6. I love fish. Eating them I mean. Hahaha. Yes, they are very cute and all swimming about in their alternate watery world. But somehow, in the midst of admiring their beauty and grace I find myself thinking if they would be tasty. Sushi maybe? Hahahaha. If I ever turned vegeterian, giving up fish would be the hardest part. I already love mushrooms, so that's not too bad, but the fishhhhhh. I love the marine world and snorkelling is one of the most loved activities of mine. I also say DEATH to all those ignorant idiots fishing the oceans bare. (STOP WHALING ALREADY!!!!!) However, nothing is stopping me from enjoying my sushi, as long as the fish used isn't in danger of going into a population crash.


Alrighty... for this I tag.... and I don't care if you done it before, do it again, in detail!... WX, XH, FiFi, ML, Alec, Yuan.

If I were a drink...

It's a tie!
	You are a part Cosmopolitan. You are quiet and content. You don't stand out too much, but you don't mind and don't care what people think of you. You don't need everything to be perfect, as long as you get what matters. Sure, you may be 'girly' and you may not be the smartest, craziest or most refined, but you really like yourself, and that's fine by you.
	You are a part Whiskey on the Rocks. You are tough and you know it. It takes a long time for people to get to know you but you wouldn't have it any other way. You don't care what people think, but sometimes that turns people off of you.

To Various People

song : Last Order - Eason Chan
mood: disheartened
book-in-hand: Fabric of the Cosmos by Briane Greene

To all those graduating or thinking of going back to school/work:




PI = Professional Industry


To us left handers =) :



To the few I know in the advertising industry :



To EVERYBODY:

Pictures and drawings taken from http://indexed.blogspot.com/ and http://cheeminology.blogspot.com/

Of Lawyers and such

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place. Shu, if you ever become like this, I'll shoot you myself :P

ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
______________________________________________________________
ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you
forgot?
_____________________________________
ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS: We both do.
ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
WITNESS: We do.
ATTORNEY: You do?
WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his
sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
____________________________________
ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty-one.
________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you shittin' me?
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Uh.... I was getting laid!
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Are you shittin' me? Your Honor, I think I need a
different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Now whose death do you suppose terminated it?
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Guess.
_____________________________________
ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on
dead people?
WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. Would you like to rephrase that?
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
WITNESS: Oral.
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him!
____________________________________________

ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Huh....are you qualified to ask that question?
______________________________________

And the best for last:

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

Somethings are bred into you

Personally, I think the fact that I am the first born and eldest grandson in the family has a very big part to play in who I am today.

You Are An ISTJ

The Duty Fulfiller You are responsible, reliable, and hardworking - you get the job done. You prefer productive hobbies, like woodworking or knittings. Quiet and serious, you are well prepared for whatever life hands you. Conservative and down-to-earth, you hardly ever do anything crazy. You would make a great business executive, accountant, or lawyer.

What's Your Personality Type?

Mental Note to Self:

Never..... ever take a nap late in the evening no matter how tired I am. It is now nearly 7am and I only have myself to blame before dragging myself to classes at 9am. Oh well... at least I finished some work and my report. Here's something I found while surfing to while the time away:


Japanese fooled in poodle scam



April 26, 2007 - 8:59PM



Thousands of Japanese have been swindled in a scam in which they were sold Australian and British sheep and told they were poodles.

Flocks of sheep were imported to Japan and then sold by a company called Poodles as Pets, marketed as fashionable accessories, available at $1,600 each.

That is a snip compared to a real poodle which retails for twice that much in Japan.

The scam was uncovered when Japanese moviestar Maiko Kawamaki went on a talk-show and wondered why her new pet would not bark or eat dog food.

She was crestfallen when told it was a sheep.

Then hundreds of other women got in touch with police to say they feared their new "poodle" was also a sheep.

One couple said they became suspicious when they took their "dog" to have its claws trimmed and were told it had hooves.

Japanese police believe there could be 2,000 people affected by the scam, which operated in Sapporo and capitalised on the fact that sheep are rare in Japan, so many do not know what they look like.

"We launched an investigation after we were made aware that a company were selling sheep as poodles," Japanese police said, the The Sun reported.

"Sadly we think there is more than one company operating in this way.

"The sheep are believed to have been imported from overseas - Britain, Australia."

Many of the sheep have now been donated to zoos and farms.

The website




Note: Will be locking this place down on monday. Bye bye readers who I don't know.

If you smile/laugh, you lose.

Take Life With A Pinch of Salt

I feel you dude... I feel you. So pass the salt.